i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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