the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
