dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
