I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
You're a waste of cheezeits
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize
