what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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