You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
