there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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