Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
