afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
