He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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