I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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