how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Randomize
