Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
