3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
