this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
