Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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