okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
