Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
