We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Randomize
