What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
