I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
