piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
