grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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