I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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