I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
