just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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