I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
