fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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