Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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