Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
