Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
