Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I don't deserve a penis
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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