:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
