Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
