Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
