im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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