i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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