that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I wish you could order shots online.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
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