sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
