I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
