I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
