Nicole vs. Life
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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