I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
