that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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