I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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