i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Randomize