Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I have feelings that need drinking.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
