Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
