I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
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