those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
