just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
